Childish and Immature 11/25/08

Childish and Immature

By: Maria Reylan M. Garcia

A preschool teacher sat at the middle of a circle formed by cross-sitting five-year olds. Her friendly smile kept her pupils' attention; those cute and goggling eyes wrapped her with untainted enthusiasm. "Who among you here, hugs and kisses their parents and says I love you to them all the time?" In almost an instant, several hands covered in paints of blue, red and yellow as remnants of their Art class were thrust high into the air bearing much pride and confidence. The teacher's smile widened, she knew it was going to be a long afternoon; each pupil has his story to tell. A college professor stood at the middle of the rostrum, her lessons were reflected on the projector screen and her class was doing all they could to scribble some notes and keep themselves awake for the next five hours. Her austere expression morphed into a kinder one when she said, "Who among you here still hugs, kisses and says I love you to your parents all the time?" What came next was a moment of transition, and slowly a few hands were almost visible. The professor grinned; she seemed expectant of the outcomes. Her topic concerned about familial relationships and she knew it was going to be a long afternoon.

Kissing, Hugging and Saying I love you to parents may gather some varying responses, each with their own reason. Some would believe these to be childish and immature, that once your voice deepens of puberty or you start to worry about pimples and zits, you already are banned from giving your old dad even just a sweet peck on the cheek. Some rather, including myself, prefer to keep these habits and look at them as the primary means of showing affection, love and respect to the folks that brought us to life. I, personally, am not sure of the history how kissing, hugging and saying I love you to your parents became childish and immature in anyway. But, others do believe that it prohibits a person's independence from his parents slowing them down on finally living on their own.

A friend justified his side, contesting that some parents won't let their children kiss, hug or say I love you, and that is why these children would grow to be quite cold and inexpressive. He further stated that, to some parents when a child would be affectionate, tendency is there would either be a 3-day sale in one department store with her coveted shoes on the rack or a new arrival of imported shiny gadgets bursting with an array of must-have features. Some children refuse to kiss and hug or even mutter the three magic words because their parents would imply immediately or would simply be ice cold. But either way, I believe that children, no matter how austere and unemotional parents are, must have the initiative even just out of such debt of honor to let them, the parents, know that we, the children, do love them. Regardless if the parents would react or not, at least the child made a move and an effort to let them know.

I am someone who needs to feel in actuality before I would believe. I am someone who needs to be hugged, kissed and be said I love you before I would internalize that you indeed care. It feels really different to kiss your parents goodnight than to just assume that the three of you would have sweet dreams. You have to let them know that everything they've been through, everything their going through and the reason for them to continue remains with all the worth in the world because you appreciate those everything. It is so easy for us when we were children to reach for daddy's hug and be soaked in mommy's kisses because we weren't thinking of what others might think. The point is, I love my parents and that's that. But, I wonder why when we grow older and realize more the worth of our parents that should have actually give us more the reason to give back, we tend to grow far apart from them.

Hugging, Kissing and Saying I Love You, these three, especially hugging, triggers the release of oxytocin which is a hormone in our body, causing us to be more relaxed and at ease. We all have our fair share of stresses, and our parents are just around. You get two benefits from hugging, kissing and saying I love you: first, you get to feel more relaxed and rejuvenated and second you have made someone close to you happier. It just takes some few minutes of tight bear hugs to tell a woman who bore you painstakingly for nine months and eventually risk her life giving birth to you, to let her know you are in gratitude to her love. It just takes some few steps to walk towards your father who for several years had work blood and sweat to offer you the best, to kiss him goodnight and let him know that you appreciate him.

If some would say kissing, hugging and saying I love you to parents is childish and immature, then yes.

I am Childish and Immature.