Where did I come from? (01/20/09)

Where did I come from?
By: Maria Reylan M. Garcia

Every parent would agree with me that one of their biggest dilemmas inchild-raising would often start with their toddler's question, Wheredid I come from? There goes the story of an old flying stork withinfants swaddled in white muslin hanging on his long bill, droppingthem off to an expectant couple's doorstep. Then, here come themisleading explanations: you were there fruit of our love, you weregiven to us by God, and you were an angel sent from heaven. Parents may each have their own style of reason or in other cases, their ownstyle of evading the question. Soon, the child will grow up, learnreproductive anatomy and physiology, then realize that those raginghormones were the culprits of his existence.

But I am certain, that the day I understood that a wiggling flagellumof a motile sperm has to defy the pressures of temperature, acidityand even his fellow sperms just to fertilize an anxious ovum, I simplysmiled, a bit disgusted if I have to be extra honest. I did not smilebecause my malicious device has been tuned up to work, but I smilebecause having a baby is one of the few miracles that could happen insomeone's life.Just when the womb begins to inflate, begins the expectant mother'sagonizing forty or so weeks of pregnancy and the father's never endinganxiety. I studied Normal Obstetrics just a few days ago, andthroughout the three trimesters of pregnancy, may mark the happiestand most disturbing phase of a couple's life.

I don't intend to give apre-natal counseling and how-to-do tips, but I intend to emphasize the
very reason why we, children need to respect and love back ourparents.Imagine, an unknown woman to you, who never knew your future flaws andlimitations, who never knew you could hurt her so much with yourimpeccable attitude, could love you so much and bear to risk her lifefor you to have life. They say the pain felt in labor and deliveryamounts to tenfold the throbbing discomfort of constipation, and yetour mothers pushed without second thoughts. They say the complicationsof eclampsia that could leave your mother in coma, the possibility ofmiscarriage, and the psychological depression are to be feared whenhaving a baby, and yet our mothers conquered without doubts.Imagine, a stranger, a man unknown to you, who never knew yourunending days of buy me this and buy me that, who never knew you candisappoint him with your reckless stunts, could love you so much andstand on his strong feet to raise a family. They say fathers don'thave their share of sacrifices during pregnancy, that they won't feelexcruciating contractions and early morning sickness. But, they dohave their own psychological battles of accepting the responsibility,the lifetime vocation of raising a family rather than a single man whocan enjoy night outs without restrictions.

Indeed it is a miracle how a man and a woman could give life and loveto a toothless, drooling and bald stranger. The rise and fall ofproblems doesn't end in your first birthday, for as long as you willlive your problems, your confusions, your tantrums will all be placeupon your parents' shoulders. I feel sad of the thousands of childrenwho went astray from their parents. I understand that they sometimes could misunderstand us, forget our personal space, or hinder our verysource relaxation, but you know, even how strict and austere yourparents our, their love remains true and untainted.

They have been in our shoes and we still haven't been in theirs, as my mother wouldalways say "Mabal-an mo na lang na kung Nanay ka naman". The very factthat they let you live is already a strong indication of their love.They could opt to abort you to get free from all the futureresponsibilities, but they chose to let you live, they chose to feelthe pain and confusion of parenthood.

When we were shown a live video of a woman giving birth in a deliveryroom, most of my classmates were astonished and gave some considerableshrieks and giggles. But, I was there at the back of the classroom,with little teardrops jerking from the side of my eyes. Not because I was scared that one day I'll be in that woman's position, grieving inpain; but, because I have that same kind of woman waiting for me athome everyday, loving me more each day, since almost eighteen yearsago.

Where did you come from?
Stop whining and follow your parents.